In the deep reaches of the night . . .

[AverageOldGuy]

I returned home from Vietnam in early 1970 after a year in the bush. I had no flashbacks or bad dreams.

For a while.

Then, one night about a year later, my wife waked me up. It was past midnight, I was standing on the back deck of our house, facing the woods. Ghosts and voices were coming out of the woods. I didn't even know where I was, did not know when or how I got out of bed and went out on the back deck.

Same thing happened at odd times over the next few years. Gradually it stopped. But still 55 years later and at age 81, from time to time I sit up late, after the house -- now the apartment -- is quiet. And sometimes the ghosts appear.

The ghosts are 18, 19, 20 year old kids that I helped put into body bags. Hell, I was a 24-yr-old kid.

Watching Lawrence tonight. He opened with a segment that featured the father and sister of Army Specialist. Declan J. Coady, 20, of West Des Moines, Iowa. Coady was a student at Drake University in Des Moines. His father and sister spoke on Lawrence's show. I do not know how they had the strength to speak on camera.

"War is at best barbarism. . . . Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, more vengeance, more desolation. War is hell."
William T. Sherman

[yellow dahlia]

1. Thank you for sharing your story, oldguy.

We are in a place of collective grief and visceral pain. We didn't all serve, but we can still feel a shared grief and pain...if we have empathy.

[Permanut]

2. Peace to you, AverageOldGuy..

80 year old Navy vet here, served on a tin can out of Norfolk, Virginia, never was within 5,000 miles of 'Nam.

Two friends didn't come back. Another, my best friend, commited suicide later. After 55 years I still miss those guys.

[TBF]

8. My dad served when you did - he just turned 80 in October.

He did basic training in Great Lakes and then was based in San Diego. He did go to Vietnam on a destroyer - they hauled stuff over there. That's about as much as I know - he and my uncles would never talk much about their service. The other two are already gone, my dad is the last living Vietnam Vet in the family.

[SheltieLover]

3. ...

[RainCaster]

4. What a heart felt story

You left me with a lump in my throat. It was hard for me to read this to my wife without choking.

[JMCKUSICK]

5. Thank you for such a personal example of yet another

price to be paid for these decision that will reverberate for generations AverageOldGuy.

I'm sorry that it has to be you that bears the burden of their memory.

[BigMin28]

6. Much

thanks and ❤️ for sharing.

for all those that never came home.

[Unwind Your Mind]

7. I woke up Saturday morning believing my brother was in Kuwait already

I texted him and found out he was still on a US base on standby

He was in the invasion in 2003 so I was freaking out and remembering that day

I’m grateful he’s not there yet but that could change. I remember how it felt to have my loved one in danger and I care very much about any soldier killed

I am so sorry we’re here again. Thank you for sharing your story

[calimary]

9. That Sherman quote may be the new Quote of the Week.

But then again, it’s only Wednesday.

[blue-wave]

10. One of the greatest lessons my late father,

who fought in WWII from the Battle of Aachen to Nazi Germany's surrender taught me, was that for the average man or woman, there are no winners or losers. We all suffer. He said: "War should always be your very last option. Never wish war upon anyone."

[Intractable]

11. It was 1975. I was 11 years old at Boy Scout camp in the mess hall waiting in line for the food.

Some old guy leaders from another troop were discussing Vietnam.

I asked, "What is Vietnam?"

I was severely yelled at and chastised by man I did not know, for not knowing. And after that, I still did not know.

Later that week, I watched a scoutmaster from another troop paddle a boy's ass for failing his swim test. The paddle was made just for this purpose. It was painted fancy, and had the words "the hand of justice."

The leaders in my troop were nice men, fathers who cared about us. I'd have left the scouts if it were not so.

[oldsoldierfadingfast]

12. As an Army Nurse during the VN war...

I saw the broken bodies and/or minds that could never be repaired, the diseases that would could never be completely cured.
So many of our finest men and women would come home with PTSD; others turned to alcohol or drugs to wipe for a short while the memories of what they saw and had to do during that war. A good number have committed suicide.
The families of these men and women suffered as well. Marriages were destroyed, children had to grow up with an alcoholic or severely depressed parent. Mother and fathers watched as their child slowly destroyed his or her life. I'm sure each of you get the picture and can add to it.
Veterans Admin.is remains dealing with the homeless and ill from that war!
My own brother came back an alcoholic with flash backs - got divorced, leaving 3 young children with a single parent. It took his 4th wife to understand and help him turn his life around.
I hate it when people learn that I was a part of that war and thank me for my service - where were they when the VN vets. came home to ridicule? Where were they when Bush sent us a RETIRED ARMY pin and a letter wanting us to encourage young people to enlist in his (Cheney &Rumsfeld's)war plans.
Where were they when I along with several others were at home on leave and sitting in church (in uniform) and the minister calls us "baby killers"?
Except for a few funerals, I have not been to church since.
Bob Dylan said in June 1062, "I am only 21 years old and I know there's been too many wars... you people over 21, you're older and smarter."
I'm now 86 y.o. and I say, yes Bob, we ARE older but, we are still NOT any smarter. And no, I do not sleep well at night. May the fires of Hell burn brighter and hotter for anyone and everyone who plans and promotes a war!