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RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:24 AM Feb 2015

I need some advice on our son.

He's in 8th grade; will be entering HS in the fall. He's a smart kid and never got a C on a report card.

He's strong in most subjects but especially math. This year he is taking 9th grade algebra and struggling.

I love his teacher and she really wants him to succeed, I bring him in for extra help but last semester he just squeaked out a low B on his report card.

I have to make the decision soon if I want to transfer it to HS, which will obviously be on his transcript, or have him take it over in 9th grade.

Advice?

44 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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I need some advice on our son. (Original Post) RiffRandell Feb 2015 OP
Is the only acceptable grade an A? ret5hd Feb 2015 #1
No. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #3
I was raised with that. It was soul-killing. DeadLetterOffice Feb 2015 #6
I never got above a C in math. fasttense Feb 2015 #23
Yeah, I wasn't the greatest tester. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #35
Does he know and understand the material? DeadLetterOffice Feb 2015 #2
Thanks. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #7
Then I'd let him move on to geometry. DeadLetterOffice Feb 2015 #14
Thank you. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #20
B means good. Take it. roody Feb 2015 #4
I don't expect him to be. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #36
I think you are right. Math isn't like history eridani Mar 2015 #44
If the low B went on his Junior year grade, yeoman6987 Feb 2015 #5
Good advice. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #16
Are you more worried about maintaining high avg grade or furthering math proficiency? Panich52 Feb 2015 #8
Made my decision. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #10
.... handmade34 Feb 2015 #18
Fun? RiffRandell Feb 2015 #38
I may be late to the party so take this for what it's worth. CincyDem Feb 2015 #19
Very nice, thoughtful response. n/t DeadLetterOffice Feb 2015 #21
Thank you. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #26
Post removed Post removed Feb 2015 #9
Jesus, I asked for an opinion! RiffRandell Feb 2015 #11
It could be that the member is expressing a painful memory... NYC_SKP Feb 2015 #24
Thanks! RiffRandell Feb 2015 #31
Dude, chill. DeadLetterOffice Feb 2015 #17
Thank you. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #22
There is a lot going on at that age and that grade level packman Feb 2015 #12
Thank you; I really appreciate it since I got fucking hammered RiffRandell Feb 2015 #13
He is "struggling" with extra help and squeaked by with a low B TexasMommaWithAHat Feb 2015 #15
He's doing better this semester bringing him early RiffRandell Feb 2015 #32
ignore the nasty. mopinko Feb 2015 #25
Thank you! RiffRandell Feb 2015 #34
take the b. put him in all the AP course, in all the rest of subjects and let him do a regular seabeyond Feb 2015 #27
Thanks for the input. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #39
both boys did that with their spanish, also. yes. my oldest graduated with enough course to seabeyond Feb 2015 #42
This is one of the gateway classes... Sancho Feb 2015 #28
He really likes math. RiffRandell Feb 2015 #41
It is understandable that you Newest Reality Feb 2015 #29
What does you son want to do? I'm curious. madamvlb Feb 2015 #30
Isaac Asimov wrote "Realm of Algebra," "Realm of Numbers," etc. raging moderate Feb 2015 #33
The first year I took Algebra, I was struggling Demeter Feb 2015 #37
In FL you can take it over in online class voteearlyvoteoften Feb 2015 #40
Tutor draytontiffanie Feb 2015 #43

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
3. No.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:30 AM
Feb 2015

I've had parents telling me I don't want a low B on his HS transcript, which also depends how he does this semester...if he took it over next year he could pull out an A.

DeadLetterOffice

(1,352 posts)
6. I was raised with that. It was soul-killing.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:31 AM
Feb 2015

Swore I would *never* do that to my kids. **shudder**

 

fasttense

(17,301 posts)
23. I never got above a C in math.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 12:58 PM
Feb 2015

Yet did great in Geometry, trig and physics. But that was back when girls were not suppose to do well in math. My Algebra teacher made us take the test that he gave at the end of the year. He said if you got an A on it you didn't have to take the class. I not only got an A, I got 100% correct. Math was easy but class was boring. I read the entire math book when he handed it out on my own. I spent that semester in the library. Yet my grades on my report card were always Cs.

Testing does not measure what teachers think it does.



RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
35. Yeah, I wasn't the greatest tester.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:29 PM
Feb 2015

Pretty cool you got out of the test! I could have NEVER read a math book.

I always thought they gave shitty examples, too.

DeadLetterOffice

(1,352 posts)
2. Does he know and understand the material?
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:29 AM
Feb 2015

Or does algebra still seem a mystery? This is a much more important question, IMHO, than what grade is on his transcript.

If he "gets it" then making him take the class again is almost cruel - he'll be bored to tears and maybe even end up with a lower grade.

If he DOESN"T "get it" then taking it again makes sense, since everything from here forward will depend on him understanding the basics of algebra.

Just my .02.

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
7. Thanks.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:32 AM
Feb 2015

He gets it...a lot of times he makes stupid mistakes but the extra help does work.

He would start geometry next year which I think he'd get in a heartbeat.

DeadLetterOffice

(1,352 posts)
14. Then I'd let him move on to geometry.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:42 AM
Feb 2015

I have a different perspective on grades than the other advice it sounds like you've been getting.

I was super-pressured to get A's and A's and A's. And I did. And then I got in to a really awesome college, and completely fell APART. Plus, I've lived my whole life with the internal message that perfection is the only acceptable option. Not good.

So as we've raised our sons I've found myself much more focused on "do you understand this" and much less on "did you test well on it." But I'm also not trying to get my kids into the Ivies.

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
36. I don't expect him to be.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:33 PM
Feb 2015

I get frustrated with his laziness, which isn't related to this math situation.

I understand you have to study formulas and such, but to me math is something you either really get or you don't. Correct me if I'm wrong.

I got B's, but I don't think I "got" it.

eridani

(51,907 posts)
44. I think you are right. Math isn't like history
Sun Mar 1, 2015, 10:35 PM
Mar 2015

If you blow the Civil War test, you can always make it up on WWI. If you don't get the first chapter in algebra, going on to the second is pointless. A real problem with math teaching is that students will "get" Chapter 1 at wildly varying rates.

 

yeoman6987

(14,449 posts)
5. If the low B went on his Junior year grade,
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:30 AM
Feb 2015

I would not. However, Freshman year isn't as important. Of course it will be part of his total high school average but should not lower it too much if he does "A" work in everything else.

Panich52

(5,829 posts)
8. Are you more worried about maintaining high avg grade or furthering math proficiency?
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:33 AM
Feb 2015

Maybe the decision is more whether he thinks he's ready for Algebra II. And if higher math classes are desired. A single 'low B' is hardly a career killer and learnibg the material is more important than the grade.

Yes, GPA can influence college ap, but if he's ready to proceed, 1 B shouldn't weigh so heavily.

.

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
10. Made my decision.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:36 AM
Feb 2015

I'm taking it! Thanks for all your input. I'm not a helicopter parent; it's just very competitive where we live and I've had other parents say they would absolutely NOT take it.

handmade34

(22,940 posts)
18. ....
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:47 AM
Feb 2015


post up thread noted that he would probably be bored with another year of algebra... seems wise to accept the B and let him have fun w/geometry next year...

after all my kids and teaching (although not math) I would just recommend continuing the extra work this semester and continued review in summer...

Math is way too much fun to either unrealistically demand too much or bore with redundancy

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
38. Fun?
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:37 PM
Feb 2015

I'm kidding! I actually liked it and would be proud of myself when it would finally click.

Back when I was in middle school I was in advanced classes so took pre-algebra in 7th grade (struggled). algebra in 8th and it finally made sense so I did well.

Took geometry in 9th grade.

CincyDem

(6,959 posts)
19. I may be late to the party so take this for what it's worth.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:53 AM
Feb 2015

1. Whatever decision you make will be the right decision for your family. Only you know the total context of the decision - it's more than just a grade on a report card. But you already know that.

2. Algebra tends to be a bedrock skill on the math side - it's going to come up in geometry, trig, calc, stats...etc. There's a reason why they teach it first. Take this from someone who did well in eight semesters of college math.

3. Answer the question "why is he doing a little less well in this area now than in others". If it's an attention to detail thing, that's going to work itself out in practice and experience. But - it's a conceptual challenge...for some reason he's just not wrapping his mind around the concepts, that could be a challenge for him in the future because a lot of stuff is going to rely on those concepts. Not getting the concept isn't about being smart or stupid. And it's not about the teacher being a bad teacher or a good teacher. It's about the match between the two - about the way the teacher teaches and your son hears.

For what it's worth, we had two kids who did advanced math. One reached too far up in the 8-9th grade and decided to do Algebra I again. The other reached far to far in freshman year at college and decided to take another run at it in a later semester. In both cases, they were happy with the outcome. That was in our family - yours will be different.

Don't look at it as helicopter or overly competitive - look beyond the grade and ask if it's conceptual or executional. If it's conceptual, give serious consideration to taking another run at it next year. If it's executional - move on and he'll pay more attention to details with age.

Good luck with either direction - there's no right/wrong answer and his greatest source of success will be your (his parents) interest in his success.

Response to RiffRandell (Original post)

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
11. Jesus, I asked for an opinion!
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:38 AM
Feb 2015

He's a great kid, and your comment was completely uncalled for.

He's never gotten punished for a B...my only question was if I should transfer it. I'm still learning as a parent.

I cut him more slack than most parents I know.

That was fucking hurtful.

 

NYC_SKP

(68,644 posts)
24. It could be that the member is expressing a painful memory...
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 01:29 PM
Feb 2015

...and that expression of the memory could be instructive.

I don't know that it was meant to hurt you, but I do know that there are dangers from our culture's pressure on test scores and grades that, to be kind, put more stress on kids than is healthy, IMO, and on parents too.

Good luck, take care.

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
31. Thanks!
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:05 PM
Feb 2015

I'm a very laid back parent and so is my husband. Both of our kids get the complimentary comments on their report cards such as good citizen/eager to learn/good peer/helpful/polite/shows leadership qualities and my son has gotten picked for his school's leadership committee from his peers, teachers and principal since the 5th grade. Two are picked per class.

I just had a question!

For the record I did not alert on above comment.

DeadLetterOffice

(1,352 posts)
17. Dude, chill.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:47 AM
Feb 2015

That was so over the top. Just because this parent has a question about grades doesn't mean that they have the same horrible attitude as your parents (and my parents) did. No cause for accusations of ruining the kid's life.

 

packman

(16,296 posts)
12. There is a lot going on at that age and that grade level
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:40 AM
Feb 2015

Grades may, and seem to be, of the utmost importance to you. However, you do not live in his world or his skin. "Dropping" from an A to a B is not the end of the world. I would thinks you might look at the standards and the critique of his previous teacher who gave him that A. Perhaps, just perhaps, he has run into a teacher who doesn't believe in grade inflation which is rampant especially in middle schools. Look into the classroom objectives and the curriculum goals. A conference with some paperwork explaining what is being expected from him to obtain an A should be given to you as well as an explanation of the teacher's/school's grading policies.

However, as stated above, you have a lot of outside pressure and expectations being thrown at him. Be cool about it.

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
13. Thank you; I really appreciate it since I got fucking hammered
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:41 AM
Feb 2015

for asking a simple question.

TexasMommaWithAHat

(3,212 posts)
15. He is "struggling" with extra help and squeaked by with a low B
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 11:42 AM
Feb 2015

That's not a description of a child who is doing really well in math.

If you can get him extra help, I would get him a tutor during the summer.

A grade of "B" should not be cause for concern, but having to work for a low "B" does not bode well for Algebra 2.

Good luck.

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
32. He's doing better this semester bringing him early
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:11 PM
Feb 2015

3 times a week. I should have been on it, but he neglected to tell me his teacher offered it last semester.

When I found out, his ass was in there every morning which helped him get the B and he did all the extra credit possible.

I never had to monitor him too closely...he was always good about doing homework, and honestly, was smart enough to skate by with mostly A's and the occasional B.

Not so much in 8th grade, which he and I have realized.

Thank you!

mopinko

(71,913 posts)
25. ignore the nasty.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 01:30 PM
Feb 2015

so uncalled for.

maybe he gets it fine and is just bored w the mechanics? i was great at math concepts, but bored w the details, and made a lot of stupid mistakes.
if that is the case, making him take it over will probably only make it worse.

is he good about the homework? my kids are all very bright and were so bored w homework that is was a big problem.

the good part, tho, oldest son went on to graduate college magna cum laude, first in his class, with an almost perfect gpa. he is in the graduate program at u utah, in theoretical math. he reach that level because he was challenged.
for bright kids, that is a must.

good luck.
ignore the trolls.

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
34. Thank you!
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:25 PM
Feb 2015

The strange thing (and that goes for most of his subjects) is that he doesn't have that much homework.

I had at least 1-2 hours a night when I was his age. Perhaps it has to do with the fact our school is pretty close to the bottom 50 in education standards. Thankfully our kids attend the top schools in our county.

His algebra teacher was so complimentary towards him when we began corresponding; she said she wished more of her students were like him as he is so sweet and polite. My son told me a story when this nasty girl in the class sent a mean text to another student about the teacher who saw it. My son felt so bad for her as he likes her.

Math is not my strong point, and this "new" math that is being taught now frustrates the hell out of me.

Congratulations on your son! You should be very proud!

 

seabeyond

(110,159 posts)
27. take the b. put him in all the AP course, in all the rest of subjects and let him do a regular
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 01:39 PM
Feb 2015

geometry.

it matters your state. in my state they have to do 4 yrs math. my kids excelled in all BUT math. hardly worth it, trying to make it thru the advanced and then stressing about the grade, while having the advanced courses and advantages of those AP courses for their other three classes.

i like taking the algebra to high school because for my kids, that meant 3 yrs high school math, not four. they get tired by their senior year. freshman year in high school is adjustment, stress, ect.... for different reasons.

or

make him take it again, for a better foundation in algebra II

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
39. Thanks for the input.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:47 PM
Feb 2015

I knew I wasn't pursuing math in college so after my junior year in HS trig about freaking killed me so senior year I took "business math" which basically taught you how to balance a checkbook and consisted of basic adding and subtracting...needless to say I got a high A.

I was tired by my senior year!

I swear our 8-year old daughter could get an A in it.

I think our state requires 4 years of math too but I guess I need to get on it and find out.

He's also currently taking a foreign language because he tested well on the entry exam which means he'll only need 1 more in HS, so he's ahead in that respect.

 

seabeyond

(110,159 posts)
42. both boys did that with their spanish, also. yes. my oldest graduated with enough course to
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 03:57 PM
Feb 2015

transfer to university, he was a mid freshman. one semester already done. i love the AP course. also, another advantage to them, is they get an added 5 points onto gpa. so if they do not get a great grade elsewhere, like the b in math, that would follow him, a single AP class would raise it to mid 80's. two ap course brings it to 90's. one low b wont be the end of the world, with other AP courses to give that extra five points, per class.

Sancho

(9,106 posts)
28. This is one of the gateway classes...
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 01:44 PM
Feb 2015

Your school district may have lots of material to cover that is mandatory, and some kids are not developmentally ready for all the algebra concepts (see Piaget, etc.) and the speed of instruction.

I taught middle school and sometimes I had good students who struggled with math and science, especially if they were young, didn't have exceptional study skills (so they appeared to make careless mistakes), or couldn't visualize the concepts. Some simply did better if they repeated, but some got it in HS because they grew up. Math tutoring definitely should help.

There are LOTS of really good alternate lessons and examples to help with algebra, so with your teacher's help you should try them. It's important that he doesn't start to hate or fear math. That's a killer for the future.

BTW, I don't think you sound like a bad parent (as other posts imply).

RiffRandell

(5,909 posts)
41. He really likes math.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 03:29 PM
Feb 2015

To the teacher's credit, it's a 9th grade class and she may be preparing him for HS.

The simple mistakes have improved as we've discussed not rushing, going over the problem more than once if you have time during testing and knowing the formulas. I see a difference in that alone.

Thanks for the great advice and being a teacher...one of the hardest jobs out there and it sounds as if you really care.

I know I'm not a bad parent; the comment just took me off guard as I never come in here but thought, hey...what a great place to ask!

Newest Reality

(12,712 posts)
29. It is understandable that you
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 01:45 PM
Feb 2015

want him to do well and excel at school.

However, are you putting a strong emphasis on his achievements and strong points? I mean, he sounds like he is succeeding and there is so much focus on becoming better or improvement that it can make a person feel like nothing they are doing will ever be enough.

So, the struggling with a particular subject is stressful enough, but it might be a good idea to make a feedback sandwich for him by pointing out how well he has and is doing and how you understand that not everyone excels at all subjects, as a matter of fact.

Strong emotional support and sound feedback will at least shore him up and might relieve the tension of not feeling "good enough" with a "low B". Then, from there, maybe you can also help him find more motivation and enthusiasm, as well as a healthy ability to BE rather than just be in a process of becoming.

You might also want to look into his proclivities for learning. It is not always a "one size fits all" activity. I would suggest looking into how he is being taught algebra and see if there are other ways to help him approach it. He is dealing with higher levels of abstraction and not everyone comes to a point where they can deal with it well at the same age. The Internet is your friend in this case.

madamvlb

(495 posts)
30. What does you son want to do? I'm curious.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 01:50 PM
Feb 2015

You state that you have to make the decision, how about your son making the decision with some "input" from dad? I think at this stage in the game both of my boys were making these decisions with a little input from mom! My youngest son was the called the "absent minded professor" at school. He never did his homework and it reflected on his grades. He aced the SAT and got a full scholarship to a very prestigious college. He also won the world robotics championship!!! So my advice is this...chill out! Let him decide with a lot of input from you.

raging moderate

(4,511 posts)
33. Isaac Asimov wrote "Realm of Algebra," "Realm of Numbers," etc.
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:24 PM
Feb 2015

I struggled with math of all kinds as a child. My turnaround began when I read this wonderful series of books by Isaac Asimov. They are full of beautiful insights about the inner workings of algebra and other branches of mathematics. He made the logic and the lore of mathematics come alive for me! All the way through, I kept saying to myself, "So this is what that teacher was trying to tell me!" After that, I found it so much easier to learn all kinds of mathematics.

 

Demeter

(85,373 posts)
37. The first year I took Algebra, I was struggling
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:33 PM
Feb 2015

It's an entirely different concept than arithmetic. But Algebra 2 went much better. I changed schools and textbooks and teachers (and states) in between, though.

A tutor who isn't the original teacher might be more helpful...seeing two different explanations of the same thing, two different methodologies...

If it helps, I got 800 (perfect score) on the SATS Math Level 1 in junior year. And math is not my strongest point.

voteearlyvoteoften

(1,716 posts)
40. In FL you can take it over in online class
Sun Feb 15, 2015, 02:48 PM
Feb 2015

Then substitute grade for classroom grade depending which one is higher. My daughter retook algebra and raised her grade. Good Luck!

draytontiffanie

(26 posts)
43. Tutor
Sat Feb 28, 2015, 11:15 AM
Feb 2015

Math tends to get difficult for many kids right around that time.. Best thing to do is get a tutor for him.

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