Can we really trust our health care providers?

[CountAllVotes]

I was never one to trust anyone, esp. doctors.

I went for a routine exam a few weeks ago and was asked this question: "How have the falls been lately?".

Falls? Lately?

I'm suspicious as all hell now. I no longer trust this provider.

They are either on your side or they are not. It seems that this is turning into a NOT.

I haven't told the provider about any falls I have taken out of fear. What kind of a way is this to live?

I told the provider I wasn't particularly worried as I always wear proper shoes when I go outside or am doing laborious work around the house.

They want to get me OUT of my house and snap it up for the have's around here. I believe I have mentioned it before that a "neighbor" keeps telling me I need to move. Of course, they have a relative near-by that is eyeing my house.

Is this plain sick or what?

Its doing me no good whatsoever!

[TwilightZone]

1. Why would you not tell your provider about falls?

Being honest with your health care providers is crucial. Falls can be indicative of myriad other health issues.

I understand distrust, but the concern for one's health should transcend that. They can't help you if they don't know what's going on.

I'm admittedly a bit biased, having recently been diagnosed and treated for cancer. In my case, full disclosure was paramount. Symptoms that might have otherwise seemed innocuous provided necessary context and led to a quicker diagnosis.

[CountAllVotes]

3. I think they want me to move out of my house

I don't care to move to an assisted living center. I'd rather be dead frankly.

I hope this is not the plan and why now? That's what I don't get.

Its not like I'm been showing up at the ER from taking a fall!

I don't trust them. Nope.

[DURHAM D]

5. Who is "they" that want you to move? nt

[viva la]

7. I have been inundated with calls and emails from real estate brokers and flippers--

who say they'd love to "give me a great price" on my house.

The "great price" is a real low-ball, like $90K less than it's really worth.
"We already have a buyer!" Yeah, their partner or relative. They count on us not being really aware of the change in housing prices since we bought the house decades ago.

[Ocelot II]

10. Me too, and I ignore them.

[Merlot]

14. Anyone and everyone who owns a house gets the calls/mailings from flippers

They make insultingly low offers, hoping to find someone either desperate or ignorant of the value of their house. They also say there are no fees, but actually there is (in one case) a 4% fee which is the same or higher than a listing agent doing a regular sale would charge.

The predatory companies that take advantage of people like this are disgusting, but nothing to worry about. They're like Nigerian princes and telemarketing.

[MotownPgh]

15. REAL ESTATE OFFERS

These real estate offers are common. Is there some reason your doctor would be "in" on some plot to get you out of your house? Do you have any friend or family that you can depend on for help or guidance?

[TwilightZone]

8. The fall question is a standard one.

It's asked of pretty much everyone of a certain age and anyone with either a history of falls or medical conditions that could lead to them. Some doctors ask everyone - a doctor I had decades ago was asking me on routine visits in my 20s.

They're not asking it because they think you should move out. They're asking it because it's a standard medical question with important medical implications.

[Ocelot II]

9. Why would your doctor want you to move out of your house?

And even if they did, all they can do is recommend that you move. You can live wherever you want to live; your health care provider can't make you do anything.

[DURHAM D]

2. My cousins doctor asked her the fall question and she responded yes.

The doctor wrote her a script for physical therapy. My cousin thinks the therapy changed her life for the better.

[viva la]

4. Falls are often a result of a momentary blackout or heart arrhythmia

So determining the cause can lead to treatment of that underlying issue too.

[Ocelot II]

6. They always ask about falls if you're older. There's a good reason for it.

They'd be negligent if they didn't ask. Falling can be a symptom of other problems, and even if you fell only once by accident (slipping on ice, for example), older people are more likely to be injured as a result. I have no significant health problems that would be likely to cause falling but they always ask me about it anyhow, just because of my age. They are doing their job. You have to have some trust in your health care provider (or find one you do trust) or you run the risk of becoming ill with a condition that could have been treated.

[appalachiablue]

11. That's a strange and blunt opening for a health care provider.

I understand your concerns and would feel the same way. How tied to this person are you and can you switch to another practitioner if you want?

Maybe it's the times and disregard for seniors in general but this kind of treatment by staff is seen in other fields as well, business, accounting, banking, law, real estate. I saw it first hand with my aunt, uncle and mother. People's gender, age, race and social, marital and economic status are definitely factors when seeking services IMO.

[Ocelot II]

12. I don't understand the problem. Asking about falls is a standard question

when the patient is older because falls are dangerous and could be a symptom of something serious. It would be malpractice not to ask, and it certainly doesn't express disregard for an older person. If they phrased it as the OP describes, that seems like an odd or awkward way to ask - I would expect the question to be more along the lines of "Have you fallen lately?" Otherwise I don't get the concern about it.

[appalachiablue]

13. It's the manner in which it was stated, as an assumption

rather than a question which is unprofessional and sloppy. A lesson on malpractice or medical care isn't needed. I worked in elder and health services and cared for several relatives for 20 years and have 3 MDs, and a nurse in the family.

[Ocelot II]

17. Didn't intend to insult your expertise

and I did point out that the question was oddly phrased.But I don’t attribute malice or lack of concern to the nurse, and I certainly don’t think they were trying my to get the OP to move out of their house.

[appalachiablue]

19. No problem, thanks for the reply. Yes, I saw your

comment about the how oddly the question was posed. I understand how some seniors are concerned about remaining in their home and may be on edge about it, even a bit paranoid.

In the last 20+ years, there's been a mass amount of media and marketing focused on the subject of aging, esp the large, Boomer generation. Plentiful articles about mountain and beach retirement properties and communities, health and fitness, travel, etc. I know my parents and grandparents didn't see anything like this in their senior years.

As well, emphasis on the topic of growing older and less independent. The need for home help devices- 'help, I've fallen and I can't get up' was the topic of a lively SNL skit.

A while ago I read an AARP article about when the family and parent should meet with the doctor to determine whether driving should be discontinued. I'll post that here if I can find it.

[Runningdawg]

16. As a retired nurse, I understand why you didn't want to tell them. If like me, you have no family or friends nearby.

The day I admit I am having problems living alone is the day social services steps in, declares me incompetent, assigns a state babysitter who then takes my dogs to the pound, parks me in the lowest price nursing home and pockets the change.
I saw this happen time and time again!! At Christmas this year I learned it had happened to a friend in WY. She did have some family, far away, they are now trying to regain control, but she is going downhill FAST.
No thank you. I would love to die from a fall in my own backyard, not tied to stretcher in hell.

And do I trust the profession? Not anymore. 2 years ago my Dr told me to take the crap in the box test. I told her no. It arrived anyhow and I refused delivery, sent it back. So imagine my surprise when the office sent the results of my test!! That was the last time I ever saw that Dr.
A big red flag should have been the first visit when she stuck the fat lady for a blood sugar reading - 92. But without knowing I was a nurse, pronounced me a diabetic then there. I am not and have never been diabetic.

[CountAllVotes]

18. Bingo

I live alone and my husband died in 2022. I own the house I am living in and its value had gone up X5.

I have no relatives that care one bit about me (a tRUMPer, need I say more?)

This provider is a nurse practitioner. I haven't seen a real doctor in years!

I have a seriously disability (MS) and yes, falls can be part of it but my house is set-up for a disabled person as is the outside yard and the sidewalks were just made accessible by the county.

I think if something went seriously wrong they'd try to snap up what I have left and put me in a care facility somewhere!

I just got the results back from the blood work I had done and it was dangerously low! I haven't been eating much because I haven't much of an appetite and the death of my husband has me in a state of absolute grief. My dear cat died on Valentine's Day last week and that just adds to it.

I'm glad you understand. Maybe I should switch providers. I've never asked about how my falls have been lately and oh, btw, what falls I have had were due to not having proper shoes on and being in a wet garage and standing on plastic sheeting.

Thank you for your understanding and I am elderly btw. Soon to be 68 years old if I live to see it.

[Runningdawg]

20. I hope you get the help and peace of mind that you deserve.

[CountAllVotes]

21. I want them to leave me alone

If I need them, I'll contact them.

Otherwise they can all 'eff off if you know what I mean.

Let me worry about something other than their very poor quality of care!

Thank you for your reply.