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Not Heidi

(1,466 posts)
Sun Nov 27, 2022, 08:31 PM Nov 2022

Gaslight? May I talk about this?

VENT

My wife just tried to gaslight me. Is this strictly gaslighting? Or just being a major asshole? Either way, minor incident, major irritant.

Brief background: Since I got* lithium toxicity, I've been craving juice.** I've had a steady supply of orange and grapefruit on hand.

About half an hour ago, I told my wife I was going out to the garage to get some juice.

She: May I have a cup?
Me: Grapefruit or orange?
She: Grapefruit.

I go back to the kitchen to get another glass, then to the garage, then back in with the juice.

As I hand her her juice, she says, "I wanted a soda."

Me: I told you I was going for juice. You asked for a cup.
She: Isn't Squirt grapefruit?
Me: Yes. But you asked for a cup of grapefruit juice.
She: I asked for a Squirt.
Me: *STARES*
She: Since you're still up, would you get me a Squirt, please?

It's triply irritating because of my current mental state. Who pulls that kind of shit on someone who is so unstable? Christ, did I want to lay into her. I'd really, really like to have at her. REALLY.

I dropped it, but I'm still burning. My anxiety has ratcheted up about three notches.

Thoughts?


* "Got"? Did I *get* lithium toxicity? I don't know how to put it. Oh, well.

** I don't know if juice and lithium are related. The timing is curious.

8 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Gaslight? May I talk about this? (Original Post) Not Heidi Nov 2022 OP
Minor irritating misunderstanding/change of mind. elleng Nov 2022 #1
Maybe she has memory problems Sanity Claws Nov 2022 #2
My thought, too. 3Hotdogs Nov 2022 #4
I use imagination training with music Tetrachloride Nov 2022 #3
I swear and use profanity a lot... BigmanPigman Nov 2022 #5
I find marijuana to be very helpful in situations like this, helps me keep a sense of humor Canoe52 Nov 2022 #6
Second. (n/t) OldBaldy1701E Nov 2022 #7
This message was self-deleted by its author Duppers Nov 2022 #8

elleng

(136,595 posts)
1. Minor irritating misunderstanding/change of mind.
Sun Nov 27, 2022, 08:37 PM
Nov 2022

I know nothing about lithium toxicity.

TRY to ignore.

Sanity Claws

(22,053 posts)
2. Maybe she has memory problems
Sun Nov 27, 2022, 08:40 PM
Nov 2022

Maybe she said it in her own mind and not aloud. Maybe she said something when you were already out of earshot.
If you have been married a while and she seems to be doing what you called gaslighting only recently, whatever happened was probably unintentional. Unintentional misunderstandings happen all the time.

Tetrachloride

(8,478 posts)
3. I use imagination training with music
Sun Nov 27, 2022, 09:38 PM
Nov 2022

some Enya

the Polynesian song Loma Loma

occasionally classical

occasionally folk classics

then i sleep. doing it now. cheers

BigmanPigman

(52,340 posts)
5. I swear and use profanity a lot...
Mon Nov 28, 2022, 01:56 AM
Nov 2022

it helps me when fellow humans act like this. I would have had a stroke about 30 years ago if I did 't swear like a sailor. It definitely improves my driving, I must say.

Canoe52

(2,963 posts)
6. I find marijuana to be very helpful in situations like this, helps me keep a sense of humor
Mon Nov 28, 2022, 11:58 PM
Nov 2022

and to shrug it off when normally I’d be stewing about it the rest of the day.

Response to Not Heidi (Original post)

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