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[Denninmi]

This message was self-deleted by its author (Denninmi) on Thu Feb 21, 2013, 03:28 AM. When the original post in a discussion thread is self-deleted, the entire discussion thread is automatically locked so new replies cannot be posted.

[intaglio]

1. I hate that question

because it is a leading question, designed to bring a response that the inquisitor can then focus on. Too much thinking about it can lead into the deadly spirals of questions familiar to many bipolar/depressive people. Because of this the best way to deal with it is the snap answer.

What do I want out of life?

Not to die is a good start, but not something I can do anything about (com'on you scientists ...!)

Live without fear or despair, although those are part of my condition I can ameliorate them.

Happiness - oddly there can be lots of that but sometimes it is impossible to remember.

Success. But success a chameleon; for a quadriplegic getting to the door is a success, for Mitt Romney success would be having a rich white guy in the White House. Work out what success means. For me it sometimes means just getting through the day without too many extreme episodes.

You'll make your own list but don't over analyse, they will all be things you desire but achieving them may need help or time.

[Tobin S.]

2. I asked the question

I was just trying to get Denninmi to look at the big picture. It's hard to do sometimes even for people who aren't suffering from mental illness symptoms, I know. I was just hoping I could get him to stop focusing on stuff that's bringing him down.

[intaglio]

5. And the response was mine to such a question

I did not say the question is invalid but it is a very difficult question to ask for the reasons I outlined.

The big problem is that it can lead into unprofitable areas of introspection which is why giving a snap answer has, in my experience, been preferred. That experience is that people with a depressive element to their problems can over think. Outside of the "down" the snap answer highlights the deficit that the "high" produces and brings that element of the problem into focus as well.

Mine isn't a perfect response - but nothing is - we're all human and we can all benefit from friendship such as you have shown to Denninmi

[Tobin S.]

3. I'll tell you what I want out of life.

I want my wife and a child, foremost. I want to be able to provide a good life for them. I want to get a job that pays me enough to provide that good life without having to break my back. I want to retire when I'm in my 60s and be well enough off that I don't have to worry about money or health care in my old age.

That's about it.