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Wicked Blue

(6,722 posts)
Wed Nov 6, 2024, 10:14 AM Nov 6

I am almost ready to drive to the beach and start walking into the ocean

to end it all.

My adult daughter, who lives with us, has spent most of the past hour screaming verbal abuse at me while driving both our dogs to the vet. She's upset about the election, but she's taking it out on me. I was crying in the back seat, petting my terrified dog, She screamed at me for crying, assuming it was because of the election. She denounced me for thinking Kamala would win. I told her I wasn't crying about that -- I was crying because of the mean things she was saying to me. She started yelling even more.

I got silent, afraid to say a word, And got yelled at for "ignoring her." At one point I asked if she could drive a little slower in a 30 mph zone, and she exploded at me, screaming that I should be grateful she was driving my dog to the vet at 8:30 am -- the early morning appointment was for her dog who was getting a dental cleaning and the vet had suggested we bring in both dogs as mine was due for a shot. It was no fault of mine that this was an early morning appointment. I have back and knee problems so I can't lift my dog in and out of the car (dog is 15 with bad arthritis) so the daughter usually helps.

Today she demanded that I apologize to her, that I thank her for driving my dog to the vet, that she was never driving my dog to the vet again, and that she was reporting me to animal control for some bizarre reason. She screamed at me for anything she could think of. I am terrified of her when she gets like this.

She has been diagnosed with several mental health issues, and is in therapy and on meds. She says she can't work because of her anxiety, so she lives with us, both seniors, and refuses to apply for SSDI. Just sits in her darkened room playing computer games and watching movies. The only things she helps with are grocery shopping, the dishes and cleaning old foods out of the refrigerator. She only cleans her own room. She would never lift a finger to vacuum the rest of the house or help with cleaning or yard work. She won't cook except for herself.

My husband, who is out of the country at present, telecommutes with a very high stress job with long hours. He wants to work 2 more years and retire at 70. She verbally abuses him too. She doesn't do this to us constantly, but often enough when she has PMS or some issue that she's focusing on. He hates it but is so afraid she might kill herself that he won't set any boundaries with her. She attempted once some years ago.

I am 72 and I can't take much more. My beloved dog is over 15, and she can barely walk. I can't think of anything to look forward to. Being treated like this when I am already despondent about the election is almost the last straw.

Sorry, I need so badly just to vent.

8 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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I am almost ready to drive to the beach and start walking into the ocean (Original Post) Wicked Blue Nov 6 OP
Virtual hugs pat_k Nov 6 #1
Thank you Wicked Blue Nov 6 #2
Take care of yourself and hang in there. Lonestarblue Nov 6 #3
Thank you Wicked Blue Nov 6 #4
This is awful. I am so sorry. Easterncedar Nov 6 #5
So sorry for what you're going through. Bluepinky Nov 6 #6
... Anon-C Nov 6 #7
I want you to stay here. shenmue Nov 6 #8

Lonestarblue

(11,928 posts)
3. Take care of yourself and hang in there.
Wed Nov 6, 2024, 10:22 AM
Nov 6

You have every right to feel upset. Taking care of someone who doesn’t appreciate your help is difficult. Unload here when you need to.

Bluepinky

(2,335 posts)
6. So sorry for what you're going through.
Wed Nov 6, 2024, 10:31 AM
Nov 6

This election was bad enough.

Take care of yourself, and vent when you need to. It feels better to let it out.

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