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Marthe48

(19,449 posts)
Sat Sep 21, 2024, 09:15 PM Sep 2024

We've been friends 67 years

Now, through a series of injuries, on top of long time chronic health conditions, she is in bad shape, probably dying. She got a kidney transplant 5 years ago and was doing well. Last year, she fell, and got stitches in both knees. In Nov, she twisted her arm and the dialysis port which was still in place failed, cut off circulation. The e.r. dr. farted around 8 hours trying to figure out why there was no circ. By the time she got surgery, the whole arm, hand fingers were in jeopardy. The vascular surgeon saved all but half of her little finger and the very tips of 2 others. She was in the hospital almost 3 weeks, and got home rehab for 3 weeks. She was supposed to go to a rehab center for outpatient sessions, but winter in Northern Oh discouraged her. So next step down was getting bedsores. And in spite of treatment, they are out of control. She went to a wound center most of May, June and July. Then hospital for surgery, where she was diagnosed with a staph infection, now rehab, where so far, she's fallen, she's gotten a uti, and more wounds. The wounds may be a symptom of a worse condition. My friend is in pain, suffering, hasn't been eating, drinking, so her kidney function is in jeopardy. The rehab staff talked to her this week about hospice. I'm here most weekends seeing my friend, keeping her cat company. I don't expect my friend to recover and it's so sad.

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We've been friends 67 years (Original Post) Marthe48 Sep 2024 OP
sending hugs Tumbulu Sep 2024 #1
I'm so sorry to hear this. Her experiences remind me of my mom's sinkingfeeling Sep 2024 #2
So sorry to hear this, it's so hard. we can do it Sep 2024 #3
I'm so sorry, Marthe48. Diamond_Dog Sep 2024 #4
I'm so sorry. barbtries Sep 2024 #5
Wish the best outcome for you both. Hugs. Srkdqltr Sep 2024 #6
Oh my.... Bayard Sep 2024 #7
Sending ((hugs)) KarenS Sep 2024 #8
This is so sad for her. Good thoughts to you both and so glad shes had her old Karadeniz Sep 2024 #9
So very sorry. PittBlue Sep 2024 #10
That really hurts. So sad for you both. efhmc Sep 2024 #11
Yikes! 2naSalit Sep 2024 #12
I'm sad to hear this and send you and your friend hugs. summer_in_TX Sep 2024 #13
I'm sorry to hear about your friend having to go through this. calimary Sep 2024 #14
I'm not the only one Marthe48 Sep 2024 #16
I am so sorry. I will pray for her and for you. You are indeed a good friend. LoisB Sep 2024 #15
Thanks DUers Marthe48 Sep 2024 #17
Your friend has suffered so much. It's difficult to hear. Joinfortmill Sep 2024 #18
I'm so so sorry XanaDUer2 Sep 2024 #19

sinkingfeeling

(53,374 posts)
2. I'm so sorry to hear this. Her experiences remind me of my mom's
Sat Sep 21, 2024, 09:21 PM
Sep 2024

final years. When she passed at 95 1/2, I hardly cried. I felt she was finally pain free and at peace. Hugs to you.

Diamond_Dog

(35,306 posts)
4. I'm so sorry, Marthe48.
Sat Sep 21, 2024, 09:28 PM
Sep 2024

It’s breathtaking how fast it goes downhill for some folks. My mother was like that. Our medical care system doesn’t help.

Your friend is so lucky to have a friend like you who is willing to help out in such an extensive and selfless manner. I can only imagine how exhausting it’s been physically and emotionally. You truly are the definition of the word “friend.”

barbtries

(30,007 posts)
5. I'm so sorry.
Sat Sep 21, 2024, 09:39 PM
Sep 2024

Especially that she is enduring so much suffering. She's fortunate to have you for a friend, I'm sure your presence is worth more than gold to her.

I hope, if she truly cannot recover, that her pain is eased and her passing is peaceful.

Bayard

(24,145 posts)
7. Oh my....
Sat Sep 21, 2024, 09:53 PM
Sep 2024

I'm so sorry, Marthe48. Its really hard to watch our loved ones go through this kind of trauma. My family had to with both my Type 1 diabetic sisters.

I'm sure you are a great comfort to her.

KarenS

(4,706 posts)
8. Sending ((hugs))
Sat Sep 21, 2024, 09:54 PM
Sep 2024

The older we get the more we go through and the more we see. I wish you strength to get through this. You are a wonderful friend.

Karadeniz

(23,598 posts)
9. This is so sad for her. Good thoughts to you both and so glad shes had her old
Sat Sep 21, 2024, 10:29 PM
Sep 2024

Friend on her side through these difficult times.

summer_in_TX

(3,326 posts)
13. I'm sad to hear this and send you and your friend hugs.
Sat Sep 21, 2024, 10:53 PM
Sep 2024


She is blessed to have you as a faithful friend.

calimary

(84,722 posts)
14. I'm sorry to hear about your friend having to go through this.
Sat Sep 21, 2024, 11:43 PM
Sep 2024

YOU may be the one consistent, caring person in her life right now. Sounds like she can use some company as she goes through this agony. I’m so glad she has YOU.

Marthe48

(19,449 posts)
16. I'm not the only one
Sun Sep 22, 2024, 05:40 AM
Sep 2024

And I'm glad her circle of relatives and friends are giving her and me so much support.
Thank you.

Marthe48

(19,449 posts)
17. Thanks DUers
Sun Sep 22, 2024, 05:44 AM
Sep 2024

I know I'm not alone. My younger daughter came to see my friend Th. My older daughter came with me for this weekend and saw my friend Fri. We are all sad.

Joinfortmill

(16,699 posts)
18. Your friend has suffered so much. It's difficult to hear.
Sun Sep 22, 2024, 07:51 AM
Sep 2024

It must be very difficult to witness. I'm old and sometimes think about my end. What I wish most is to slip from this life quietly and peacefully. I wish that for your friend, too and prayed for her.

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