Seniors
Related: About this forumFrom my senior friend who loves jokes: Interesting thoughts about the past year:
1. The dumbest thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner.
2. I was so bored I called Jake from State Farm just to talk to someone. He asked me what I was wearing.
3. 2019: Stay away from negative people. — 2020: Stay away from positive people.
4. The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house and their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!
5. This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her dog. It was obvious she thought her dog understood her. I went into my house and told my cat. We laughed a lot.
6. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.
7. Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands?
8. This virus has done what no woman has been able to do. Cancel sports, shut down all bars and keep men at home!
9. I never thought the comment, “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!
10. I need to practice social distancing from the refrigerator.
11. I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to the Backyard. I’m getting tired of the Living Room.
12. Appropriate analogy. "The curve is flattening so we can start lifting restrictions now” is like saying “The parachute has slowed our rate of descent, so we can take it off now.”
13. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and asking for money.
14. The spread of COVID-19 is based on 2 things:
A. How dense the population is,
B. How dense the population is.
15. I will stay up late this New Year’s Eve. Not to see 2021 come in, but to be sure this year leaves!

TigressDem
(5,126 posts)12. Appropriate analogy. "The curve is flattening so we can start lifting restrictions now” is like saying “The parachute has slowed our rate of descent, so we can take it off now.”
marybourg
(13,367 posts)These are very funny
dchill
(41,938 posts)sprinkleeninow
(20,794 posts)🥳 💖
CaliforniaPeggy
(153,474 posts)
ZZenith
(4,356 posts)#14 my favorite.
Thanks!
pansypoo53219
(22,097 posts)LOL! thanks.
Response to CaliforniaPeggy (Original post)
ZZenith This message was self-deleted by its author.
ShazzieB
(20,167 posts)I think my favorites are no. 2 and no. 5. Also the last 3!
intrepidity
(8,251 posts)Thanks for sharing, I got more than a few belly laughs from them!
MyOwnPeace
(17,292 posts)I would have thanked you sooner but I was busy forwarding them to others!!!
randr
(12,540 posts)Wisdom is often disguised as wit
StClone
(11,869 posts)hermetic
(8,830 posts)I've always believed that the best way to defeat something is to laugh at it. And this thing has been a real challenge. So, Huzzah! I say.
question everything
(50,007 posts)I liked this
13. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and asking for money.
Nitram
(25,399 posts)CaliforniaPeggy
(153,474 posts)Other people either send them to her, or she searches for them herself.
They're usually forwarded to me, so that's my guess.
She does have a great sense of humor!
Rebl2
(16,108 posts)#11. I did that a lot last summer. Unfortunately now it’s winter and tomorrow there will be ice and snow.
Also #’s 13, 14, 15
burrowowl
(18,197 posts)DeeDeeNY
(3,707 posts)So funny!
benld74
(10,085 posts)sorrisa
(3 posts)Thank you... truly needed this and will pass them on... how can one even pick the "funniest" !?!
Thanks again and looking forward to more relief in any form I can find it
czarjak
(12,733 posts)BMW2020RT
(146 posts)4. My step daughter is constantly calling her mother. Mother is not amused.
6. While I was home with shingles and the virus I put on 6 or 7 pounds.
12
Mr.Bill
(24,906 posts)The wife and I really enjoyed these.
OxQQme
(2,550 posts)

housecat
(3,138 posts)trof
(54,273 posts)I think I love you.
Would you like to go steady?
I mean I know about your husband and all...but jut sorta?