(Religion Group) The Case of the Exodus that didn't happen

[edhopper]

As Jews gather all over the world to celebrate there Spring Festival, I find myself once again wondering at treating a fictional story and and a completely mythical man as if it was true.
The Haggadah is basically a long thank you note to God for rescuing the Jewish people from Israel, while bringing unspeakable torment down on the Egyptians. The only problem, there is not historical evidence that the Jews were ever in Egypt and the records do not support any slavery like that described in the Bible there.
The best explanation is this tale was a combination of Babylonian myth and colored by the Jewish slavery in Babylon. Fully a thousand years after the story of Moses supposedly occurred.
But like reciting the Night Before Christmas as if Santa really visited all the boys and girls. Jewish people repeat this story every year as a confirmation of how much God loves them.

[unblock]

1. It's a celebration of freedom and a recognition of the evils of slavery

It's not "a confirmation of how much he loves" us. God loving us generally strikes me as more of a Christian than a Jewish concept.

If you look at our history, the Jewish take is that god seems to love pissing all over us.

while the exodus story no doubt isn't 100% historically accurate, it's enough to just recognize that we were slaves at some point in the history of our people and to always remain grateful for our freedom and to have sympathy for those still enslaved.

[edhopper]

2. That is fine

to take it that way. But I have been to too many seders and spent too much time in Hebrew school to believe most Jews just take it as allegory for a larger issue of slavery. Especially since slavery is condoned in the Bible over and over again and never condemned.
The amount of times God is praised suggests it is as I have described.

Therefore, we are obliged to thank, praise, laud, glorify, exalt, magnify, adore, and give eternal honor to the One who did all these miracles for us and for our ancestors. He took us out from slavery to freedom, from servitude to redemption, from sorrow to joy, from mourning to festivity, and from deep darkness to great light. [Therefore,] let us recite before Him: Halleluyah!

[unblock]

3. Thanking god for delivering us from slavery is not the same as just god loves us generally

In any event, we clearly grew up with very different haggadahs.

Unsurprising, as my parents and aunts and uncles stitched ours together from a number of progressive haggadahs and added some modern poems and folks songs....

Buncha hippie atheists sitting around singing songs and reciting torah texts and eating bad food. Ah, good times.

[edhopper]

9. I hear you

I still go to my cousin's seder. It's a time I can see family. I don't get into this, because I may be an atheist, but I am not an asshole.

[Voltaire2]

5. The wonderful celebration includes a genocide.

Ignoring the fact that it is entirely fictional it is ethically deranged.

[unblock]

6. And it bad-mouths frogs. Really? a plague? Are frogs really that bad?

[Voltaire2]

7. Slaughter of the first born.

Did they leave that out at your house?
It is an essential part of the myth.

[unblock]

8. Wow my pet frog is mightily insulted you just glossed right over that

straight to the firstborn thing. Ok.

I thought it was all increasing punishments until pharaoh set the Jews free. I'm sure there was a lot of innocent deaths along the way. God is all powerful and perfect and good but pretty sloppy when it comes to revenge and punishment I guess.

Not so important that anyone died I don't think, just important that pharaoh was made to personally feel punishment. Through losing a child I guess. God is happy to throw away children's lives to make a point I suppose.

[edhopper]

10. I hear you about the frogs

so there were a lot of frogs underfoot. No big deal.

[edhopper]

11. Especially because the God of free will

hardened the Pharaoh's heart to make sure that happened.

[Voltaire2]

4. As the Official Passover Curmudgeon

I am obligated to point out that this story is both utterly fictional and genocidally hideous.
At this point both the mindless recital and my objections are a family ritual, and quite likely everyone else at the table wishes I would STFU. But I won’t. There is a new generation getting seated, they need to be advised.