The Gifts of Rejection, Mercury Retro-Robert Ohotto

[kimmerspixelated]

The Gifts of Rejection

Happy Mercury Retrograde Everyone!
We are currently knee deep in the current Mercury Retrograde in Cancer! If you are
feeling the Mercury Retrograde blues it might be time to get my audio series on
this current cycle to help guide you through this retro Cancer vibe! The retrograde
began on June 26th and lasts until July 20th so we still have quite a ways to go
with this alchemy. You can check out all that I cover in this audio series 'Mercury
Retrograde in Cancer-Healing Your Emotional Roots' below the following article.

So many themes have been animating around this current cycle and one that I've really
noticed is abandonment issues being triggered. We all have fears of abandonment
right? And given the fact this Cancerian archetypal cycle is connected deeply to
our childhood, family, and past imprinting from both -- abandonment seems like
a 'no-brainer' as a theme surfacing in folks at this time.

That said one of the best ways our abandonment issues are brought to the surface
is through rejection. We've all experience it and will again! And each time we
get rejected (whether by a love interest, spouse, friend, family member, or employer)
it seems to open up a direct path to our abandonment pain. Which really is a gift
if we choose to use rejection that way! Let's investigate why...
The Gifts of Rejection

As we begin to explore the gifts of rejection let's first define rejection for the
purposes of this newsletter. Essentially rejection is getting a 'NO' from life.
We've all experienced this many many times and it always seems to suck right?
Not only does it 'suck' it can be devastating and gut wrenching. I would have to
say that often rejection takes us to our core wounds like nothing else can. But
why does rejection have this kind of power?

I want you to think of a time when you were rejected or told 'no', bring it up in
your mind very clearly. Once you've got that memory online begin to explore what
that rejection brought up for you.
First, did it show you how you may have been 'rejecting' parts of yourself? I see
that as the most obvious insight most folks connect to. And I would say that the
usefulness of considering how we may be mirrored with self-rejection via rejection
from others is the first gift of rejection. Yet, I have found there is something
deeper on offer. Keep that memory of rejection present and let's go a little deeper...

The Main Gift of Rejection is How We 'Fill in the Gap'
Pause for a moment and reflect on the rejection memory I had you retrieve. Now ask
yourself "When I was rejected, what emotional feelings came up for me specifically?"
Got those feelings present? Now ask, 'What story did I create as to why I was rejected?'
I sense that when we are rejected it opens up a gap in us where we begin to question
ourselves. And then we tend to immediately fill in that gap with something and that
'something' is usually a shame-based story of unworthiness.

For example, we begin to ask, 'Why did they reject me? Why didn't I get that job?
What's wrong with me? Why won't that person requite my feelings for them? Am I not
sexy, smart, handsome, healed, enlightened, worthy...ENOUGH YET? Haven't I cleared
enough issues and done enough work on myself? And herein lies the gift!

Rejection acts like a cosmic homeopathy. It triggers our system with something reminiscent
of our core sense of abandonment and shame bringing that core stuff to the surface
of awareness for healing. It helps us meet our core wounding in a NY minute. In
that minute we are gifted with an exquisite opportunity to make contact with our
wounded beliefs about ourselves and love ourselves more.

We get to explore our fears of abandonment and sense of worthlessness. We get to
dialogue with our shame. And if we are willing to look at this territory in ourselves
with unconditional perception, we will see that we also have feelings of rejection
regarding God. We then get to explore our unconscious shame based projections onto
the Divine and heal that relationship too.

So what story have you filled in the gap with when you have been rejected? What
did you assume about yourself and others as to why you were rejected or told 'no'?
What did you assume about the Divine? Is God a relentless taskmaster that you must
please in order to finally get a 'yes'? Or is the Divine an unconditionally present
and loving force in your life, only giving you 'no's' when it serves your growth
and the highest good of all?

Often times, when rejected, we fail to fill in the gap with the truth of why we
got a 'no'. Instead we default to the lies born out of our childhood neglect, abuse,
parental abandonment, and indoctrinated shame based beliefs about a God we have
to earn love from because of our inborn 'original sin' (what a bunch of B.S.!! grrrr).
We also mistake someone telling us 'no' for God telling us 'no'. As if a one mere
mortal were our sole source of opportunities to get a 'yes'!

Rarely do we realize the beauty, gift, and opportunity present when someone refuses
to meet a need or leaves us at the 'altar of love'. Indeed there are many opportunities
available when we don't get what we want - when we are simply told 'no'. If the
gift is to emotionally connect with your past shame and abandonment so you can make
conscious the stories you believe about yourself -- are you in? No, I mean it...ARE
YOU IN?

That brings me to my closing thoughts regarding the gifts of rejection that I'll
offer as a few questions: What strategies do you use to avoid dealing with rejection
in the first place? Have you been driven to codependently manage others so they
won't leave you/reject you? Are you driven by perfectionism so no one can reject
your flawlessness? Do you people please and shape shift so everyone likes you?
Are you constantly trying to be a 'good' person so the Divine doesn't send its raging
wrath your way or abandon you?

Ah yes, rejection indeed is a gift that keeps on giving. Whether it's tracking your
reactive strategies to avoid it, or using the experience of it to explore your deeper
wounds and claim your awesomeness; my prayer is that you'll always stay open to
the gifts of rejection.


Namaste,
Robert Ohotto
Intuitive Life Strategist, Coach, Counselor, and Archetypal Astrologer


http://www.ohotto.com

[Squinch]

1. That is amazing. Thank you for posting it.

[Myrina]

2. Yeah, gee, that was fun ...

[murielm99]

3. Thanks, kimmer.

I needed this. It is very true!

[Ricochet21]

4. I have no idea

how Robert is equating Mercury (mind) Retrograde to feelings of rejection or being unloved. That's a stretch.
He seems to be addressing Chiron, not Mercury. my 2 cents

[kimmerspixelated]

5. Probably so.

I found it interesting anyway, regardless.
Astrology aside, I have had a lot of deep thoughts about rejection and what it has meant to me personally.

[moonbeam23]

7. i wondered about that too

What he said could also apply to Venus R as well as Chiron, but Mercury?? Seems like Mercury R would get one thinking about their decisions and what they could have done differently etc...

[Ricochet21]

8. @ $750 an hour for a reading

I'm not taking him seriously, sorry.

[BlueToTheBone]

6. Thanks for the post. I was recently rejected

for a government appointment. It bothers me some, but I know that the work would really be overwhelming and I think of it as a blessing. But it does leave me in a place where I don't know how to fill the empty space.

[Ricochet21]

9. It's not Mercury Retrograde

which is about the only thing the masses know about except for void moons and full moons.

It's Saturn all by its lonely in Scorpio

Now, that's heavy.

It's understandable though, Astrology is nutso to try to learn!

[Ricochet21]

10. On second thought

Just having the Sun go through Cancer definitely brings feeling of rejection and "nobody loves me", etc. That happens every summer, many times I overlook the simple things because the biggies are stirring a lot up.

[kimmerspixelated]

11. I was just thinking about the evolution of all the signs,

And how they connect to the seasons...Near the end of Cancer is the end of peak summer, like a sigh, a deep exhale, a lonely lapse before the shedding of leaves begin. The lapse is a disconnection, a sad where do I belong or go to from here.

[Ricochet21]

12. but it's the opposite in the S. Hemisphere

which is why I didn't parallel the zodiac to the seasons in the book (although it's accurate)

[kimmerspixelated]

13. True.

Great point.