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Tanuki

(15,373 posts)
Sun May 8, 2016, 11:16 AM May 2016

First Mother's Day since losing her

My beloved mother died two weeks go, just a couple of days before her 94th birthday. She was a wonderful person, and there was a lot of sadness for me over the past several years as she had increasing symptoms of dementia and toward the end some other medical issues, one of which ultimately claimed her life. She nonetheless remained in good spirits and every day when I came by after work and asked if she had a good day, would usually say, "Every day is a good day!" She always said it as if she really meant it. I am mostly doing OK but suddenly I am finding this day to be tough, even more than her birthday, when I was still running on adrenaline from having so many arrangements to make. It has been helpful to read through some of the other posts here from others' experiences in the past.

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First Mother's Day since losing her (Original Post) Tanuki May 2016 OP
I hear ya... Galileo126 May 2016 #1
Please don't berate yourself for being sad. You had a huge loss, and it is only natural Tanuki May 2016 #2
Pop is doing OK, considering... Galileo126 May 2016 #3
... DeadLetterOffice May 2016 #4
they say the "firsts" are the hardest orleans May 2016 #5

Galileo126

(2,016 posts)
1. I hear ya...
Sun May 8, 2016, 11:29 AM
May 2016

I'm kinda lost too today, being Mother's Day and all. I lost my mom in January, and it's the first Mom's Day without her.

I can even bring myself to even call Dad today. How self-pitiful is that...???

Tanuki

(15,373 posts)
2. Please don't berate yourself for being sad. You had a huge loss, and it is only natural
Sun May 8, 2016, 12:14 PM
May 2016

that you would still be grieving this soon afterward, especially on a day like today when there are so many reminders of someone you no longer have in your life. I wouldn't call it self pity. Is your dad coping ok?

Galileo126

(2,016 posts)
3. Pop is doing OK, considering...
Sun May 8, 2016, 02:05 PM
May 2016

Fortunately, my brother only lives 10 miles from Pop's house. (I live 3000 miles away). So, my brother checks in on him frequently.

I spent and hour on the phone with my sister - she's doing as (not so) well as I am. But, we talked, so that was cool.

How you doing?

orleans

(35,144 posts)
5. they say the "firsts" are the hardest
Wed May 11, 2016, 10:58 PM
May 2016

my mom passed over six years ago and the "firsts" were horrible for me, but so were the seconds, and the thirds. maybe the firsts *were* the hardest but.... the following few years were practically just as bad.

i'm very sorry for your loss.



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