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imavoter

(661 posts)
Sun Jul 17, 2022, 07:49 PM Jul 2022

next month will be a year.

I'm having a hard time.

Was going to quit my job last
year before my husband passed
and get something else, plus
some other goals that would require
two incomes...or at least him working so I could
do the things I had planned for my next moves.

I really want to resign, but don't
have it in me to look for something else.
It's getting harder and harder to show up for work.
I work from home, and it's also hard to give that up.

Plus coming up on a year is a lot harder
than I thought it would be.
Almost willing to consider another round of FMLA
leave other than quitting.

I'm genuinely grateful my housing situation is squared
away...and honestly my dogs are what get me up in the morning. As bad as I feel, I don't know how I'd be without something to care for.

I don't know that there's anything anyone can do.
Maybe I just need to vent.

This heat is just awful, that's not helping.
It's supposed to be 108 all week in DFW, and
that's pushing it, even for us.

8 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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next month will be a year. (Original Post) imavoter Jul 2022 OP
Hugs to you and the pups Duncanpup Jul 2022 #1
I have always find the anniversaries to be the hardest cate94 Jul 2022 #2
Hugs to you. badhair77 Jul 2022 #3
Hugs to you & your precious companions. SheltieLover Jul 2022 #4
... Ferrets are Cool Jul 2022 #5
we are here for you Skittles Jul 2022 #6
Mine has been gone 17 years now. The first two or three years I was absolutely suicidal Walleye Jul 2022 #7
The first year anniversary was the worst for me. Phoenix61 Jul 2022 #8

cate94

(2,892 posts)
2. I have always find the anniversaries to be the hardest
Sun Jul 17, 2022, 07:52 PM
Jul 2022

I hope it helps to know that someday it won’t be as hard.

badhair77

(4,645 posts)
3. Hugs to you.
Sun Jul 17, 2022, 08:04 PM
Jul 2022

Please continue to share your feelings. Everyone goes through grief differently. I know you didn’t ask for advice but I can’t scroll by without trying to help. I really think there’s a depression stage. It’s been almost 2 years since my husband passed. I’ve had some health problems and had to say goodbye to my pup. It was easier when she was there to be with me. But now I feel as if I’m seeing some light. My only advice is to keep some friends close and try to get out of the house once in awhile and just ride out the dark days. Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it. What you’re feeling isn’t unusual. The indecision is natural. I’m sending you lots of good thoughts.

Walleye

(35,999 posts)
7. Mine has been gone 17 years now. The first two or three years I was absolutely suicidal
Sun Jul 17, 2022, 11:05 PM
Jul 2022

You think you can’t go on living but you do anyway. It’s really not a choice. I hope you find some relief somehow. It’s very difficult to continue with your life after a loss like that.

Phoenix61

(17,704 posts)
8. The first year anniversary was the worst for me.
Sun Jul 17, 2022, 11:09 PM
Jul 2022

It felt like I hadn’t moved past his death at all. But then a couple of weeks later the dark cloud lifted. Death might be an event but grieving is definitely a process. It often feels like two steps forward one step back. The best advice I got after my husband died was don’t do anything for a year that you can’t get out of that you don’t absolutely have to do. If FMLA is an option use it. Hang in there. I promise it gets easier.

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