It is just heartbreaking, all you have, and continue to go through.
I wish I were in a position to help you in a tangible way. 💔
Can you at least get SSI? Have you called churches? Some have funds for such situations, although many might be tapped out with the pandemic.
The only things I have to offer are ideas & websites with self-help info.
Yale is offering their very popular course, "The Science of Happiness" for free at the link below. It's very good stuff - mindfulness, self-compassion, etc. Over 2 million people have taken this course & it has a 4.9 rating. I hope you find it helpful if you opt to try it. (It is absolutely free. There is a certificate program for professionals for which they carge a nominal fee, byt for us, it is free.)
https://www.coursera.org/learn/the-science-of-well-being
Since you like to write to purge malignant menories abd frustrations, below is the benchmark in the psych world for journaling therapy. The research is all online & objective medical tests showed increased immune system (30%, if I am remembering correctly), decreade in depression & anxiety & improved grades for students. Here is the link:
https://www.journaling.com/articles/expressive-writing-a-tool-for-transformation-with-dr-james-pennebaker-ph-d/
I had seen a site with Dr. Pennebaker's research & a free book to read online about thos topic, but am having trouble finding it. I will keep hunting & post here if I find it.
Also, a psychologist posted tips on Instagram. Here is article link about it:
https://www.localmemphis.com/mobile/article/news/health/psychologist-starts-instagram-series-regarding-mental-health-and-well-being-during-covid-19/522-238d7d80-def2-409d-b440-2c0e09ccf027
Info on mindfulness;
https://www.mindful.org/meditation/mindfulness-getting-started/
Info on self-compassion:
https://self-compassion.org/the-three-elements-of-self-compassion-2/
I hope these rwsources are helpful in some way to you. 
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