My husband's bipolar delusions are back

[get the red out]

37. Getting a divorce

I haven't updated here in a little while because it is all so surreal. We had some sessions with his therapist and it appears he wants our marriage to end, after him being gone since Thanksgiving I have come to realize this is what is best for me also. Before the delusions he would get depressed and incredibly irritable, he doesn't like the way his life has gone and his therapist thinks that has brought on the delusions. I was realizing for some time that I was trying desperately to find ways to make him happy, and blamed myself when he wasn't. I blamed my own horrible depression relapse of last year. I can't keep on, when/if the psychiatrist does reel him in medically I can't live with the potential hatefulness that ends up being directed at me. When it comes down to it, he has not taken responsibility for telling his doctor when he gets incredibly irritable to me, I can no longer accept that life.

It is so strange, he is acting like the darling man I fell in love with so far as his personality right now while he has his delusions, not that we are back to being in love or anything, I feel somewhat guilty for not continuing to try to get mental health professionals to get him out of his delusions, but I tried.