My Father died on June 02, Friday just after 7am.

[auntAgonist]

23. Orleans, your kind words, reaching out like that and the sincerity in what you convey

has touched me deeply.
I won't lie, today has been good and bad. Good for the happy memories and bad for so many other reasons.
I'm still not able to process this whole thing. It's funny, I find it easy to comfort others. I find it without any problem at all to offer my time and energy if someone is in need. For me, it's who I am and what I'm able to do.
What I have a really hard time with is opening up, accepting any help at all and telling people what I need.
I overheard my husband talking to a friend the other day. The friend obviously asked him how I was doing and he told them my Dad had passed away. Then he said this ... I think she's ok, she's been more quiet than usual and I cannot get her to talk about it.
Hah, that's me in a nutshell. He also said it's hard knowing what to do for her when she won't let me in.
I promise, I'll try harder to unlock the feelings vault and let him in. I know it's not healthy locking it all up inside of me. I know it's unhealthy to pretend I'm fine. I also know the danger to a relationship when one partner shuts down ... So I'll try harder, I promise.

Thanks to you my friend for taking the time to console and reach out. It's greatly appreciated.

aA
kesha