Miss my son

[easttexaslefty]

5. Thank you guys.

I appreciate the concern. I've done all the things I know to do. I'm on meds & I've gone to therapy. Done the suicide survivor things & helped some people along the path.
It's just such a tiring road, ya know?
No matter what I do or try I can't get the image of finding my son out of my head. I can't stop thinking of what I could have done differently. I can't stop longing to see his smile one more time.
Loosing a child, even an adult child, ( especially to suicide) makes so many people flee the scene. The others you tend to drive away.
I have the support of other survivors via the internet & other very kind people....
( but ) to be honest, nothing makes this any easier.
It's a weird thing. Just absolutely nothing makes this anything other than unbelievably agonizing.
Thank you for letting me vent.
(((((((( hugs )))))))))