What is the point becoming a better person?

[DaveJ]

Hi, I just noticed this group, and I'd consider myself a loner. I was voted the shyest kid in class in H.S. so I think that should solidify my credentials. This topic is just semi related.

What is the point becoming a better person, when it changes nothing? People all over are still able to be vile and gain everything they want out of life. They can be disgusting creatures and not know it, or not care, and continue to be happy.

They say humans share 99% of their genes with monkeys, and if one researches it, they will find that apes are not pleasant. They throw poo at one another, and will often tear you apart for no reason, sorry ape lovers. And we are only 1% different from them.

One's life just become even worse as a result of trying to be good.

Here are some examples:

WORK

-- I try to become more knowledgeable, and as a result people are constantly asking me to do things that will never result in career advancement, and in fact make career advancement harder, retirement less likely or farther off. I would like to work on important projects, but I can only spend less than half my time on them, because I'm helping others the rest of the time. I would look for another job, but I'm honest and cannot take a day off without letting them know why.

EDUCATION

-- I went to school to become more valuable to others, and as a result I have student loans for life.

RELATIONSHIPS

-- Same old story there. The meanest most uncaring people always have the most friends. I won't even go into the male/female aspect of it, like when a guy tries to be polite and the girl takes that as disinterest. This does not apply to me anymore though since I'm married.

DRIVING

-- I try to keep a safe driving distance between me and the car in front of me. As a result, people constantly change lanes in front of me. It's virtually impossible to drive safely with all the other maniacs, who get to their destination 12 seconds sooner.

TRAIN

-- I let the mischief scurry in front of me so they can get their seats first. They are in a hurry after all, so I let them go, and wait for breaks in the flow, so I can walk in a normal manner. I just refuse to play their game. (I get my seat anyway, but watching them is grueling.)

HELPING OTHERS

-- I will not go into details but I've had very bad experiences trying to help others, which nearly ruined my life financially. I think I will recover though.


These are just examples...

It's more of a general issue. It can be in regard to anything. I'm trying to improve myself, but all it does is make the world around me seem more disgusting. If I could be less caring, I would have no reason to find others disgusting. If I cared less about people, I feel I'd have fewer problems.

Sometimes I'm so polite it causes trouble.

I was at a diner once, and I felt sorry for the cooks, and said "it's so hot in here," and the guy could not comprehend that I was showing empathy for them. I wasn't complaining. But he probably thought I was a jerk. I realize that could have been phrased better. But it happens all the time. Once when I had to return something that was expired, instead of walking up to the register, I did not want to embarrass the clerk, so I tried to tell him aside form the customers. Instead of appreciating my discretion, he thought I was up to something. Stuff like this happens to me more and more. The more polite I try to be, people are not accustomed to it and think something must be awry.


I just bored myself to death with this. These are not the best examples.

I know the obvious answer, "it's all in my head." Yes, it is in my head, I know.

How am I supposed to get it out of my head?

When I see people cut, cheat, lie, gloat, abuse, am I just supposed to think "that's just the beautiful world," and smile?

I understand that you can't change everything, and I understand that I probably seem defective to many, who just go about life without a care in the world.

I'm not trying to be judgmental. I do not see others as inferior, I see them as incredibly mean. I'm not scared or confused by them. They just disgust me, and I know that sounds bad. But many people do horrible things, and I can't seem to just ignore it. I do not say anything, though, you know, what can I do? They are 'horrible' in a way that very few people seem to mind. Just as an analogy, it's kind of like being in a zombie movie, sort of, like they are everywhere and that ultimately there's nothing that can be done about it.