I am new to this so please bear with me.... [View all]
I just got my diagnosis today and it is a death sentence. I watched my mom die within a year or so after she received her diagnosis. I am determined NOT to die that way. However, dying is no big deal to me and I am not in the least bothered by it. However, what is looming over me with a heavy heart is how do I tell my wife and family? I have thought about divorcing and just go away so as not to burden them with the cost in time and money and most of all their own energies and emotions. If I could just leave and no one care that would be the way I would want it.
Is this normal to think this way? I do not want to burden anyone and especially not my family. I just want to go alone, sitting on a porch watching the world around and just decide when enough is enough and be done with it all. Is that selfish of me? I am a bit confused right now on a direction to go. I just know I do not want to go in a hospital, lying in a coma, and they having to pull a tube from my stomach so I would slowly starve to death. No, that is not going to happen. I just worry about my wife and family. I don't want them to hurt.
This sort of post sucks I know. Most of you probably think I suck because of how I would like to go. That is fine.
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